The Amazon and lessons learned

The time for my trip is getting so close! I am really excited. I am boring everyone around me with it. Amazon, Amazon, Amazon! I have packed already and still have about 3 weeks before we leave. I will probably unpack and repack a couple of times again before we leave. I am still over $600 short of the money I need. God will provide it. I have no question about that. He will provide it exactly when He knows it's the right time.
He is still working on me learning to accept help from others and depend on others. I am much to resistant to letting people reach out to me. I'm used to having to feel guilty about needing help, or feeling bad because I had to have some help. Growing up I had so many kids making fun of me for everything. When I had a little help with something, say riding the bus in junior high because I had a bad knee, the extra attention it caused me, was humiliating. I think that's the core of my resistance to help. It makes me feel like I'm not as good as I should be. I feel humiliated whenever I need even the smallest amount of help.
Well anyway, God has showed me, that we are all dependent on others for some things. He has showed me we are all dependent on Him for EVERYthing. It's taking time but I am learning the lesson. I am trying to allow others to step in and lift me up a little.
As for the money, I truly thought I could get it all myself without problem. I knew I could. But, God worked it so I HAD to let others donate the money. He also made it so that none of my fund raising efforts worked. It had to be His way not mine. So I know that the rest of the money will come when it should.
Please pray for me, and the trip, as well as all the people on the trip, and those we will be helping.
Thanks.